Chapter 2 · Pushing Open the Door

Sit down first

Her coat was taken, her shoes changed, her phone handed over for safekeeping. She sat by the tea table in low candlelight while the concierge walked her slowly through the evening: a foot soak first, then choosing a scent, then the room — and every step could be changed, every step could be declined.

When it came to the scent, she chose ylang-ylang. The concierge nodded and wrote the first line in her file: Ylang-ylang. Tea, hot. Few words. Watching the pen come down, something in her chest stirred, very slightly.

Before she lay down

In the room, the therapist confirmed the boundaries one by one: today, only the back, legs, shoulders and neck; pressure starting light; if anything feels wrong, say so at once. Nodding, she suddenly understood what her friend had meant by 'hand yourself over' — it was not losing control. It was someone placing control clearly back into her hands, so that she could dare to let go.

In the ten minutes of the hot foot soak, she fell asleep twice.